This past month, I set up my own little area in our leaky basement (to get the feel for the Sewers Level of Bard's Tale 1), and I have a 386 computer running Windows 3.1 hooked up to two very large speakers. The computer is good for only two things: playing CD's, and playing The Bard's Tale!

So, when I need to get away, I travel downstairs and start up the games... Since I have also never beaten any of the Bard's Tale games, I thought it might be fun to give it a try. After all, what good is the Webmaster@BardsTale.com title if I've never even passed any of the games???

So I created a party with a hunter, a monk, a bard, a rogue, a conjurer, and a magician. You know it's very hard to stay alive with a fresh party in the Bard's Tale! I'm trying not to cheat too much, but I will admit that I gave all of my characters enough gold to take them into the next lifetime. It seemed to me that gold is very scarce in this game. When my characters die, it could cost thousands to bring them back to life. They could have been killed by a two-bit Kobold, whose prize money would have not been more than seventeen gold pieces! So you see, I was really broke - all the time. I then gave in and filled up the pockets of my adventurers. It was the least I could do for them!

Once my characters could survive a few nights on their own, we traveled to the Scarlet Bard for a drink, and wouldn't you know it, we were told to enter the wine cellar. This all sounds so ... familiar ...

We all know that the wine cellar level one has absolutely nothing of interest, so I peeked at some maps from the Internet and quickly headed down the stairs to ...

Sewers Level 1

Here's the map that I came up with. Nothing beats a pencil and some graph paper!


In the map above, square A teleports you to square B. The big dot marks the stairs goinog up, and the down arrow marks the stairs going down. The gray shaded areas are areas of darkness.

The messages I found were "Pass the light at night" and "Golems are made of stone.". I'll keep that in mind!

Magicians are easy to kill, but that doesn't mean that you should save them for last. They will waste no time in withering your party members. This is not good.

I found that Half-Orcs are stronger than Orcs. If a monster is Half-Orc, what is the other half?

There was a statue of a "spider-god". Did I want to search it? Well, sure. When I did, a voice said, "That was not a good idea!" I fought against a spinner and easily won. I suppose it was not a good idea to waste the effort on such a pitiful monster.

If you don't need money, you can just (L)EAVE the treasure chests. You'll still get the experience points, but you won't get any gold or items. This is good if you don't have many spell points, and you don't want to keep wasting them on Trap Zap.

Very Important!!! Always carry one or two spare torches or lamps. Your bard's throat may be dry, your spell points may be spent, and you're inventory holds nothing but fighting equipment - you're screwed! You don't ever want to be trapped in a dungeon without light - NEVER NEVER NEVER!!!

It's cheaper to cure OLD then it is to cure Poisoning.

Kill black widow's quickly, before they poison you!

Okay, so I finally found the stairs in a room full of darkness. I gladly descend.

Sewers Level 2

More of the same monsters - they just travel in bigger numbers.

There are some rotted clothes and bones here. I'm checking now for a wallet...

Kill Zombies quickly. They hurt!

Spiders seem to travel in large numbers.

I am told to "Heed not what is beyond understanding."

Hey, if you're low on spell points, why cast GRRE when LERE will do for light?

"You face death itself in the form of 2 Conjurers..." Well not really...

Next month, we'll finish the Sewers Level 2 and 3. I can hardly wait!
You can contact me at WebMaster@BardsTale.com. Until next month, farewell fellow Bard's Tale fans!
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